I’ve been contemplating something for quite a while. Well stewing over it more or less. This week I finally said the words out loud, and there is something about verbalizing a thought out loud that makes your decision that much clearer. For me it brought confirmation, because instead of hesitation or adding more questions, it brought peace. And that was all the reassurance I needed. Let me rewind.
I mention it here and there on the blog that along with blogging I work with clients helping them with their interior design needs. It’s actually something I would say for a long time as a little girl “I want to be an interior designer when I grow up”. I’ve shared my story before HERE about over coming fear and taking the leap to start my own business, and how this very blog gave me the courage to do so. It truly has been an exciting ride, and I love helping my clients love their homes that much more as the project comes to completion.
Seeing the look on their faces truly is the real reward. And while I love that aspect of it, I can’t ignore where I feel the next direction that business is going. I phased back a little in the past year from taking on new projects. I had some big blogging opportunities in front of me that I wanted to pursue, and then came fall with the start of the busy season, and my baby starting kindergarten. You would think with both kids in school full-time I would find more time on my hands to get more work done. But this past year I kept feeling myself scramble, more times than not just to get through a project.
After awhile those projects no longer become fun, but more of an annoyance. I typically don’t take on clients from fall through Christmas, because life is busy and my schedule is already quite full. I wait until after the dust has settled and begin working with clients again in the new year through the summer. However as that time was approaching again this year, I found myself less and less looking forward to the next project and more of a longing to wait. Wait for what? I’m not exactly sure of. But it was enough of reassuring feeling I couldn’t ignore. So after much stewing, I’ve decided that for a season I will be closing the door to working with clients. I’m not exactly sure how long this season will be, but I’m defining it with “season” because I’m unsure if this is will be a permanent choice or not.
While that doesn’t really change things too much on the blog, I’m excited at the lighter load to focus more efforts to my blog, and enjoy being at home and a bit less distracted with my kids. I know sometimes it’s hard to close the door to a chapter in life, or put it on hold, without ever really having a concrete reason as to why or what’s next. While I don’t know what’s around the corner, I’m putting my trust in the one that does. I’m so thankful for the doors God has opened for me to pursue my dreams, and trusting in His peace to lead me to where I need to be. I know that when we make space in our lives, our schedules and our time, we make way for things to come that couldn’t possibly come forth unless we made room for them.
I remember not too long after starting this blog, I had the courage to step out and starting selling items that we would make at a local antique shop. Just to have people want to buy the things I made was amazing, and to be pursuing part of my dream. From the beginning this has felt like an amazing adventure, but one where I don’t always know what’s around the corner.
I remember the night I told my husband I was going to do it, I was going to sign up for a booth and start selling things at this shop. He stood up instantly and walked right across the room and gave me the biggest hug and said “I am so proud of you”. It wasn’t because I decided to start selling what I was making, but that I was taking a leap, what felt like a giant one at the time, to start achieving my dream. I remember when that season came to an end. I realized that even though the opportunity was good, it wasn’t the right fit for my brand, or season in life. It started feeling stressful, and became more of an annoyance than a joy. It wasn’t to say that I was giving up on it, or that I wasn’t willing to put in the hard work. No, that was proven in the many sleepless nights and making pieces while my babies slept to get ready for boutique sales, and trade shows. It was recognizing that this wasn’t the right fit for right now, and that I needed to close that chapter because a new one was ready to begin. I didn’t know at the time what that looked like, but the journey I have been on so far has been anything but disappointing. And the dreams just keep getting bigger! I look forward to what’s coming next, and am so thankful to have each and every one of you on this journey with me.
Stay in touch!