It’s really hard not to compare these days. With social media slamming everyone else success’s in our faces, we can easily fall into the trap of comparison without even realizing it. We go from cheering someone on, to slowly starting a downward spin cycle of feelings that tell us we’re “not good enough” or success will never happen for our own personsal goals. So how do we celebrate with someone, or even scroll through social media, without letting those feelings start to consume us. I think what makes it tricky, is that some days we can have a good grip on it, but on others, we can fall prey to its trap. It’s not like we don’t want to be happy for other people, or share in the joy of their success, but in a culture where we share every detail from what we ate to how we dressed that day, how do we keep those feelings of comparison from rising up? I would be lying to you if I said I had this completely figured out. I don’t. I struggle with these very feelings, where normally I would be your biggest cheerleader and sharing in every bit of your excitement, I have times where I can’t help but look at myself and think of everything that I’m NOT doing.
So when does someone else’s accomplishments begin to feel like a punch in the stomach. Like all your dreams are being lived out by someone else. When does inspiration turn into jealousy? These are tough questions I get it. I totally get it.
These are feelings and emotions and questions I deal with myself. From peers to women I admire. It’s not a constant, but every once in awhile seeing someone else’s success pierce’s like a knife, and again I have to turn my eye’s back to the One who put those dreams their in the first place. I can choose to dwell and let bitterness start to brew, or run to the One with open arms, surrender my feelings and ask Him to renew my heart, renew my mind, and trust in Him.
I knew you before I formed you in your mothers womb. Before you were born I set you apart, I chose you, I appointed you. Jeremiah 1:5
I consider it an extreme honor to know that God placed certain talents and gifts in my dna. He created me for my very own purpose, with my very own calling, my story. And whether that means I influence 100 or 1 million, my hearts goal is to please Him. To bring glory and honor to His name.
And we know with great confidence that God causes all things to work together for good for those who love him, and have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28
When I choose to fix my eyes on Him, my doubt turns into trust, and my hurt turns into being content. Being content that He does have a plan for my life. That I’m not spinning my wheels aimlessly, but that I’m following His lead, trusting in His timing, and staying in His will for my life.
I think one of the biggest things we need to remember, and when I see “we” I mean “me”, because I think I may not be the only one who struggles with this. “Creativity is NOT a completion” ~Autumn Sky Hall. We all have our own calling, our own special gifts. Although we have similarities and some may be very close, I guarantee you no two callings are exactly alike. Since when did celebrating her success translate that we are failing. Every time I start to feel those thoughts start creeping in, I remind myself of the One who created me, and that He gave me my own calling. My success’ may not look like those to the left or right of me, and that is completely ok. Because I wouldn’t be fully me, if they did.
We all know that Comparison is the thief of Joy. So when we start to feel those feeling creep in we have a choice. We can either linger and let those feelings dwell, or we can choose rest assured knowing that the God that holds the universe in His hands, has a plan, and He’s got it all figured out. I know it’s easier said than done, but the moment I take my eyes of others success and focus on Him, my feelings of discouragement disappear. I hope these words of encouragement help you breathe a little easier today friend, and keep things in perspective the next time comparison tries to rear it’s ugly face!
*You can find these quotes as cute printables from Jenna Kutcher. Links to direct quotes are included under photos in this post, or you can visit her shop on Society 6 HERE. *
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Bre! I literally stumbled upon this post today and I am shocked, completely SHOCKED at how the timing is more than perfect! Ive followed you on IG for a year, visited your blog several times but it has been a while since I was here. It was almost as if I had no control over immediately scrolling down to THIS post. With a very new blog, feeling incredibly small and discouraged lately, this post resonated with me and I love that you used such perfect scripture within. THANK YOU for your transparency and for touching this girl’s heart today.
Selena
So SO So glad to hear it!! I’m so glad you stumbled upon this post, and glad it blessed you today 🙂 Thanks so much for following along.
Bre, you have always been a tremendous inspiration to me. Your heart + soul show through each of your posts no matter what the subject.
When I met you in person at Haven I was thrilled to pieces to see the person I’ve grown to admire online was the exact same person standing before me. You are a beautifully authentic ray of sunshine, my friend.
Thank you for sharing your heart, your home, and your words of wisdom with us. God bless you.
Thank you SO much Shannon!!! So sweet of you, and it was truly a highlight to meet you at Haven as well!!! I was SO excited to see you were in my group 🙂 Have a great day friend!!
I am older and am confident with myself because i am a child of God.But this was a great post and very sweet, thanks for caring.
Thanks so much! I really enjoyed your post today.
Thank you for your wisdom, Bre. When I experience these kinds of reactions I feel petty and small, neither of which can inspire creativity. It’s always helpful, though, to know one is not alone in the struggle to put away the envy and to remember that someone else’s success doesn’t take anything away from you.
Beautifully written, and so true. Thank you for sharing. ?
I love your beautiful heart, Bre! Thank you for leading women not just in design, but in our heart issues, as well. Your light shines brightly.
I can feel like I am drowning in all the inspiration out there. Sometimes, I miss the days when it was just me and my family redoing our house without anyone knowing about it. No pressure, no timelines, just joy.
I need to take a deep breath this week and take some of the comparison and inferiority I have been feeling to God again. I appreciate your gentle reminder. xoxo
Bless you, sweet friend.
So good Sarah!! I totally hear you 🙂 Thanks!! xo
Thank you for your open honest way…I needed this reminder. May you be blessed in all you do
Oh, oh. Thank you I really needed this. Been struggling with this so much lately…I need to hear my story is the unique and doesn’t look like those to the right or left of me. Thank you for this reminder to keep my focus on Him.
Btw, I think your home is beautiful. Wouldn’t it be nice if we could see our spaces like others do? 🙂
Thanks, Bre, for this reminder. We always need to trust our Creator/ Savior, focusing on Him no matter what!
Yes to this!???
I love your blog Bre. Your home is beautiful, loved the picture of your sweet little girl holding a chicken, and your story today touched my heart! Ohhh….and the beadboard wallpaper ceiling is amazing!
Thank you so m much Jill!!! Happy you’re here 🙂
Thank you!! Your words have settled in my heart and are a reminder to rely on God when I am feeling that I am not talented enough to accomplish a project.
You are so welcome Dena! Take heart in knowing that I am right there with you 🙂 Through His strength we can accomplish all things 🙂